Exhausted . . .

This is not a word I use very often because I rarely feel this way. I am sometimes tired, like when I don’t sleep well or when I move supplies to and from storage and rack up several thousand steps and flights of stairs.

But exhausted has an emotional component. Today, I feel a weariness of my soul and a bit of defeat in my spirit.

When I think of all this week has entailed, it is no wonder this is my state of mind.

So many struggles and emotions pertaining to our school and students, my work, and how this virus is controlling so much of my life.

The uncertainty is draining. I never considered myself a huge planner, but the lack of control on even what next week may bring is so unsettling.

I thought I would enjoy the additional time with my own sons, who I dearly love, but who are made to roam outdoors. When weather forces us inside, we all seem to have no patience with each other.

The distance we must keep from our loved ones. We must stay at Grandma’s door instead of sitting at her side.

Even in our grief, we must keep the distance. I have two funerals in the next three days, and I don’t know if I will be able to attend either due to limiting numbers allowed together. I feel so bad for the loved ones left to mourn without friends and loved ones physically there to support them.

Yes, exhausted is the word. I don’t have a silver lining and the sun is not shining in any way today.

Here is hoping tomorrow will feel like a new day.

5 thoughts on “Exhausted . . .

  1. Exactly. You’ve got it. You’ve captured it all just as I can’t. Thanks for sharing your vulnerability with us. I love you. Tomorrow is a new day.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Exhausted. I hear you. I had a really bad day a few days ago & wrote about it. Luckily, sleep made things a little better and the next day wasn’t as bad. Today was hard again. And so it goes. We struggle, we have ups & downs. At least we are writing about it – that’s something. May tomorrow feel better for you.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. In this new reality we have to shift so much. Many have felt the stress of the unknown, the restrictions, the isolation. I hope tomorrow you will feel some sun on your face and a glimpse of things and people you love.

    Liked by 1 person

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