It is the season for teacher movement and that means . . . letters of recommendations and reference checks.
If I had a dollar for every letter I have written over my 15 years, I would likely be retiring next year. But what does that say about me?
Do I know too many people?
Do I have a hard time saying no to the request? DO people actually say no to a request?
Of course, I like to believe I just write really incredible letters that land people the job!
This past week, I received flowers from a couple who were two of my coaches when I was an athletic director. They have been teaching in China for two years and after many, many, many letters, online surveys, and phone calls, they are both employed for next year. The flowers were a complete surprise and very beautiful still today, when they arrived last Monday.
This past week I also congratulated a colleague on moving into administration. She will do a fantastic job building up a small school near my home. They need a good leader and she is one.
Today completed my requests for teacher and staff member of the year letters. One wife of a letter recipient said the letter almost made her cry and had asked her husband if he felt the same, which of course his answer was no. Honored, but not about to cry. Our conversation made me wonder, what am I ‘saving’ for letters of recommendation that I should be sharing with all of these people on a daily basis?
Do you ever stop to really take in the smells the surround your life? This is some of what I found today.
The day started with the smell of cupcakes, left over from my son’s birthday. This was a nice treat before church.
The next smell accosted me as I entered my kitchen- my sons’ Axe. It is hard for them to understand they can use a single spray or actually put on deodorant. The smell quickly escapes their bathroom and permeates the entire house.
As I step out the door to escape the Axe, I can smell the rain from the night before. It is hard to express this smell, but it is like the outdoors have been washed clean.
Entering church, there is always the lingering smell of incense. It reminds me of so many special events that have taken place in this place.
Sunday means breakfast at my mother-in-law’s. As we enter, we can smell it – msausage and biscuits with a side of coffee. Linda’s kitchen always smells of delicious food.
The afternoon contain smells of cleaning products, including some awesome dish soap my sister gave me that is orange clove – washing dishes never smelled so good!
Then there were the smells of the farm. Horses, cattle, dogs, and cats all provide a variety of smells, some are good and some not so much. When feeding the cattle, there is the mixture of earth, feed, and manure.
Then it was time for the baby calf to have his bottle. The sweet smell of the milk mixes with the even sweeter smell of hay and the dust of the straw.
As we come in the house, I can smell the the outdoors on the boys, almost like they have collected scents everywhere they went throughout the day. Into the shower they go, where they will use their Axe shampoo, which is not quite as strong as the body spray.
To end the night, Chad helps me cook dinner. This includes the smells of pork chops, asparagus, and potatoes – is there anything quite like the smell of potatoes?
After a quick shower that included sleepy time bath wash, my final smells are of my husband and the lavender that cover our pillowcases.
I am not sure how my dreams will smell tonight . . .
These are a few of the lessons learned tonight from Paddington Bear and his Aunt Lucy.
If we are kind and polite, the world will be right.
Always keep a marmalade sandwich in your hat in case of emergency.
When you see good you should do, do it – not because you are getting paid or for how you will be paid back. Do it just because it is the right thing to do.
Be a positive part of someone else’s day.
All you need to do to brighten someone’s day is to add a bit of sugar – through a smile, a friendly hello, or a good deed.
If you look for the good in people, you will find it.
It sometimes takes a children’s movie to remind me of what I already know, but quickly forget in the hustle and bustle. Thank you, Paddington.
Today is March 21st -3-21 Also know as Down Syndrome Acceptance Day.
I knew little about DS until our family was blessed with Graham. Graham is my cousin’s son, and even though he is small, so many are better for knowing him. His smile and the way he hugs or looks in your eyes, I just feel closer to God when with him.
Each year, we get a cute postcard of Graham with information about Downs and with the explanation that we celebrate through random acts of kindness. This could be buying coffee for strangers or sending flowers to someone who makes a difference in big or small ways.
3/21 has become a holiday I anticipate and plan at least a few weeks in advance. I can’t wait to see the faces tomorrow! I hope they will pass on the love!
Thank you, Graham, for helping me do some good I know I should, but otherwise would not take the time to do!
I do not know the ‘schedule’ or possibly the lack thereof for our church directory, but the time has come again.
We last took photos in the fall of 2015 – my how my boys have grown.
As we waited our turn, trying to keep busy with hand tricks and then word games on the phone, the boys gave some of their ‘best face’s! My husband and I went from bribes to threats for just a single photo that could be used. I said a prayer for the photographer, who knew not what waiting behind his door.
When our time came, there were stools and blocks and lights and flashes. With a little help from some potty humor – boys love the farting and poop jokes- we got some smiles and were soon finished.
As we reviewed the photos, it seemed each one had someone not at their best. My oldest asked if we could try again, but our time had passed. We settled on a not so smiley middle son and kind of a clueless look on Dad’s face, for the best little smile on my youngest son’s face. I figured I may have many photos to come to capture a better smile, but that little boy grin may soon be gone . . . along with the chaos. And for now, the challenge is to remember to enjoy them both because this is the moment which will soon be the memory.
I am not sure what is more exhausting: going on vacation or coming home?
I know I do this to myself, with too much to get done before I ‘feel good’ to leave – again my mom’s voice about leaving dirty dishes or laundry plays in my head. And that is just at home.
Striving to get ahead in work projects, even though the trip is a work trip, so that I am not swamped when I get home, I am tired before I started.
Then the trip is to a different time zone. It involves some late night fun and some early morning meetings. I have to live up to my ag teacher upbringing: if you hoot with the owls, you must still fly with the eagles in the morning!
Then there is the mental exhaustion of the ideas and all you are striving to take in. Who knew thinking could be so enervating.
Then the push to get checked out on time and to the airport. Then wait and then rush on the plane. Repeat.
I had a college speech teacher who I did not really care for, but whose words I remember and still use today – If you do not have a personal experience with a person or situation, you would refrain from having an opinion about it. This has been true for me and NYC.
As I leave NYC, I think about what I was scared or worried of when I came and am forced to confront my own biases and stereotypes I continue to have, consciously or unconsciously, about people and places.
I never once felt scared or threatened to be ‘mugged’. While I am sure this happens and I was possibly in safer parts of town, I really assumed I would feel times when I felt unsafe. There was a single instance when we went the wrong direction and ended up outside of a park where a van was providing something to a long line of homeless people. Was I feeling unsafe or just uncomfortable? There was also a drunk man on the subway, but he was a happy drunk and well supervised by his brother and only asked us to sing along to “My Girl”.
The people of NYC will be rude. While they do like their car horns, we was treated with the up most respect and courtesy everywhere we went. The city should be proud of its hospitality and tourist industries. Along with all of the security people, these are the true stars of NYC.
I was really amazed at the huge differences in wealth that is obvious in this city. I did not truly understand that a matter of blocks or a bridge will quite obviously separate the millionaires from those with not enough to get by.
NYC is a dirty city. I rarely saw trash, except for at the end of the day when it was obviously being collected for disposal. I rarely came across foul smelling areas or areas that made me think of a dirty city. Overall, there seem to be programs in place to recycle and for street clean-ups. Even after the huge St. Pat’s parade, when you would think there would be trash, the city only had litter that evening and even then, not much. All signs were gone by the next morning. And we walked over 30 miles across this city, so we were provided with plenty of opportunity.
I would never want to live in a city like NYC. Even though I don’t think I would want to give up my open view from my own front porch, after visiting this city, I see its allure. The variety of food, activities, and people would keep you supplied always with something new to try or see.
Overall, this has been a wonderful trip full of formal and informal learning. I definitely need to plan another adventure that challenges me to be real about my predetermined opinions.
About five years ago, I read, The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin. In this book, Gretchen (I am fairly certain she would be fine with me calling her by her first name!) takes a different habit each month in an area she strives to change to improve her happiness.
As I prepared for my trip to NYC and knowing I would have the chance to meet her, I thought about a variety of mindsets that I gained from this book and how much they have changed my life. From the first chapter alone, I busted some of my clutter (still difficult with young boys) and learned to do a one minute tidy-up, act energetically – especially when I don’t feel like it, and to go to sleep earlier. I know these are small habits, but small habits can really impact your happiness.
Try it this weekend. If you have a messy cabinet or island countertop, set a timer for just 1 minute (5 if it looks like mine!) and get all the clutter put in its place or in the trashcan. It is amazing how great you can feel with cleaned off counters!
Back to my encounter. So Gretchen was our keynote speaker. She spoke about the Four Tendencies, which is a book I brought with me for the plane ride home. It was a fantastic presentation. When we better understand ourselves and our tendencies and better understand others’ tendencies, we can communicate much better and be much more efficient in our work together. These are ideas for our work and personal lives. And Gretchen is funny!
Later in the day, it was time for the meet and greet book signing. As I waited in line, I thought about what I should say. Should I tell her I know we would be friends if we lived closer together? Should I invite her to the Lake the next time she was visiting her parents in Kansas City? Should I tell her that I love the book group of women/authors that she is a part of (Brene Brown, Rachel Hollis, Laura Vanderkam, Daniel Pink, Heath Brothers, Seth Godin) of which I know I will fit with incredibly, WHEN I write my best seller?
As I cumbersomely, pull out all five, yes it was FIVE, books for her to sign, I realized that she might call for security if I started down the crazy train of what I really wanted to say. Instead we chatted about how much the Happiness Project changed my daily habits. Then I asked about her talk and about the questioner tendency (that’s me) and how irritating it can be when I have done the research (a questioner tendency) but then the group still needs ‘something more’ or ‘buy-in’ to make their decision or to come to a consensus. It was a great conversation. Then I walked away, but remembered I wanted to ask about the page-a-day calendar. In 2018, I had the 2018 Happiness Project Page-a-Day calendar. I had to go back.
I was glad I did. I learned that the page-a-day calendar was something her family did, each having something different and often sharing – something my family does as well (Mom saves us the best Maxine jokes). She said it was a lot of work and not a lot of income, but that it was really popular. I don’t know if it is for sure on for 2020, but here’s hoping. And she was glad for the feedback.
From this experience I learned:
I need to be careful not to seem like a crazy person! Most people at this conference had not even heard of Gretchen Rubin, let alone read her books and had a page-a-day calendar. Did I mention I am a fan?
Reading about someone’s life makes us feel connected to them, but that connection is only one way.
I may need to read more fiction.
I am not sure exactly what my book will be about, but I will certainly quote Gretchen Rubin somewhere in it and strive to have her provide an endorsement
I would love to read in your comments who you would nerd out with? In other words, who is an author you would pack your suitcase with their books to get them all signed?
The Life Blend 